August First – Eval Day

1 08 2009

Well, here we are in Colorado with another strange month starting as the weather can’t seem to make up it’s mind.

My buddy Lisa W. is here from Racewalking Camp. She flew in from Calgary on Thursday night and has been putting up with trundling about with me since then. It’s been really great getting to know one another. I’ve never really had anyone crash out at my house, so this is a great learning experience. The rules of my house, of course, are pretty fluid. Fortunately for me, Lisa has 4 kids so my disaster of a house doesn’t phase her. Of course, the fact that I’m an extreme morning/evening person could cause issues since she’s definitely not a morning person … but it’s working. Bailey seems to like her even though Lisa is more of a cat person.

Yesterday was the last of my Allegro Pilates class for July. I missed one, which was an extreme bummer, but so it goes. I’ve signed up for August – Monday mornings – which will make things a little busy, but whatchagonnado? Lisa crashed out in the back of the room and interacted. We also went to the Chiro and shoe shopping. More on shoe shopping in a sec.

Schedule, starting in August, is getting more streamlined. I thought about this yesterday. I’ve got to get the Master’s truly up and running while taking care of a couple of incompletes. It’s all a matter of time management – something that I’ve truly never been all that terrific with. I’ve been working on getting out of work on time (2p T, W, Th) for a lot of reasons – one, of course, is that I’ve got classes M/W from 2:30 – 6 p.m. It’s not been terrible this summer getting out near time, but it’s only been practice. Fall – 1 p.m. starts clear up and that’s that. Walking/Training/Exercising/Writing will be taking more of the schedule. Those are the things I do for me and after now a year of putting everyone else first again … well … I’m tired, not exactly happy, and not moving forward in the things of my life that matter to me.

August is one of those drop-dead months and I’ve done a lot of re-evaluating because it’s time to do as such. I know a lot more now than I did last year and a lot has changed. A great deal of the chaos is being abated and since I have a next-to-none patience level for drama, I’ve been pulling back in a lot of ways. That doesn’t mean that freakish things haven’t happened … but I’ve proven that even through car accidents, race mis-haps, and lies/betrayals, I’ve been laughing through it more.

I am reeling, still, from the death of my on-line training partner/sports psychology-motivation partner Jeff. I’d finally found a bud who understood a lot of my quirks when it comes to competing and training … since he had most of the same. No, this isn’t someone I was interested in dating … get that out of your head. My buds on Facebook who are racers (walking/running/cycling) have been amazing, but we were both in the same study for the same reason. He passed away of a heart attack during a second open heart surgery. I’d written with him the day before and he was complaining about more chest pains – he’d been in the hospital about a month ago. He went that night … sigh. Was just about to register for the remainder of my races and the racewalking clinic in Marin in March 2010. I’m upset, but at least he’s not in pain or a vegetable.

My own health has been ok. I’ve been using the Nathan Water Pack for long walks and am going to buy the next size up because I nearly went dry after Sunday’s 11.5 miles. I think I wrote about it … might have to play catch up again! I’ve been having a lot of problems catching my breath and some chest pains. I am not stressing it because it coincides with a great deal of stress I’ve been under lately. Since I don’t have insurance at this juncture in time, there’s nothing I can do about it anyway!

The chest/breathing problems is what has really gotten the Lizzy Re-Eval going this time. I’m sick of it, to put it mildly. As you know from this blog, I’m sick of slow speeds, unsatisfying training, unfulfilled goals and feeling stuck. This happens to me and I usually turn in to the Lizzy Tornado, but now it’s more a matter of looking at things … and people … and seeing how they impact me and what it is that i”m trying to accomplish. I don’t see myself ever going back to being really pushy and knife-edged directed, because that isn’t me … but I’m simply not interested in my life being impacted so hard by the laziness of others.

Yeah – advanced drama abatement is in affect.

[mens+streak.jpg]Lisa and I have been having an ongoing conversation about sports motivation and shoes. The shoe issue has been more pronounced since my knee has been really slow to healing. I do like the Chiropractors that I’ve got since they’ve got the sports background and are really hip to healing, but it’s probably been time to get out of my “high-heeled sneakers”. Kristin H. has been after me to get out of the high heeled Racer ST series of Brooks. I’ve liked them because I’ve had great luck with them, but there is a potential that because that heel is so high, I’m working really hard to carve out an edge on the heel then roll to my toes. I know that I slap my foot down … and this could be a part of it. Shoe change is pretty difficult for me because experimentation costs money and I never exactly know what I’m looking for. Looking for kicks (sneaks) shouldn’t be this difficult, but for me it’s just one of those “bothers” that I’ve got to deal with. John over at Runner’s Roost has an idea for me that is coming out in January, but I need to get there!

These kicks really to roll up pretty well while still having stability in them. I am concerned, a smidge, with their being a bit smaller than my ST’s. I’ll give them a shot, however. They do come in blue and if I do like them, I’ll have to see if I can get them that way. I might, sigh, have to go up to a 11.5 men’s and that’s just depressing!

I needed the shoe lesson from no-bull-shit Lisa and it was a good one. I’ve got to donate off my old kicks. I’ve slammed down the heel for so long that even for knock-around, my old kicks aren’t helping but potentially adding to the problem.

The timing on kicks is good because the reason Lisa is out here is because it is World Class Racewalking Clinic weekend. Dave, Loretta and Cavan are in Denver and my schedulling issues really buggared this up. I wouldn’t be at the clinic this year had she not come out of Calgary and be camping out in my office! Sunday is the Tri-for-a-Cure and I’ve got friends in there … and friends battling the disease. I would have really liked to have done it this year, as you recall last year I had to back out after being kicked too many times in the face in the pool and being concerned about not being healthy enough to do the event. This would be my third clinic and there are things I really need to have Dave look at, but I also need to be supporting friends at this event. So – I’ll be spending today in new kicks trying them out to see how the handle things.

The knee is ok. I’d say I’m maybe 50% back to normal. It is probably better than that, but it’s a conservative assessment because I’ve been far too optimistic and damaging up to this point. I’ve got clearance to be back in to weights, full yoga and pilates. This does mean that time and financial management are more paramount, but so be it. Kathleen teaches the Monday Morning Pilates class and I’m already registered – 10 a.m. on Mondays. That means I’ve got to change about my 9 a.m. Monday Chiropractic appointment, but that’s fine too. I’ll have afternoon classes starting in a week – so I’ll flow with it all. I talked with her about doing yoga at her studio on Friday nights. I like the laid back way she teaches and the routine aspect vs. “hum … what should we try now”. I’ve already blocked out this time … so there she goes!

Training is a higher priority at this point. I’ll probably have to do the locker on campus thing again and just either train in the Brooks leaving a pair in the locker or tote the PZ’s back and forth. I don’t like the weight room, but I do like the fact that the Cherry Creek Res. bike path is really close by. No excuses.

Lisa has a group she trains with in Calgary. Part of me would really like this, but I know how I’ve been in training groups up to this point. Denver Fit, although they’re nice folks, was a nightmare to me. I don’t mind the training with TNT, but it gets frustrating because I’m not considered one of their Walkers but I’m not a slow runner. I’ll simply have to get together with Kristin H. in Boulder area and lump it! Yvonne and Janet have a Saturday morning training group that I go back and forth on. I guess with the car issues, I don’t really like feeling like there is anyone waiting for me. I’m working more on getting my ass out the front door and down to Bible Park and the environs … whether or not I like it. I guess part of the reason I do this this way is because I don’t tend to race with other people.

Am I “upset” about missing about 1/2 of the clinic. Not really. I have a few things I need help with right now – getting my feet under me and a refresher on exercises … but I’m still Injured Reserve.  This clinic and last plus the camp I’ve been either injured or injured/sick. You can only get so much out when you’re not at full potential. Doing a heart-rate test on me right now wouldn’t yield much true baseline information because I do not anticipate being in this condition too much longer.

With the death of Jeff, as with the deaths of other friends in the past, I’m thinking about the interwoven nature of things. After wasting so much time on non-committal drama, I’ve got less patience for it. As a floaty person who doesn’t like making decisions and lose options herself, this is an interesting development … but for those who truly know me understand that I’ve not had a lot of patience for it anyway up to this point. Friends are more important to me, but their drama and such can be left at the door in order for them to deal with it. We all talk and kvetch, but it’s up to the person themselves to deal with it … not to skuff it off onto others … because at the end of the day, we close our own doors and crawl in bed with ourselves and our lives.

So – Lisa’s starting to get up. I’ve got to get dressed, throw three sets of kicks into a bag and get going.

Oh – Bailey things Lisa is the most awesome. Since both she and Bailey are cat people life is grand.

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